If my comment threads and Facebook discussions are any indication, then our recent posts {Raising In-Charge Daughters, 5 Tips for Raising In-Charge Daughters, and Homeschooling the Strong-willed Child} really hit home with many of you.


As challenging as it is to raise a strong-willed daughter, BEING that strong-willed daughter, wife, or mother is quite another challenge.  (Experience speaking!) 


Several of you posed questions that begged Biblical answers: How do I submit to my husband when he won’t lead? What if I’m a better leader than he is?  How do I have a meek and quiet spirit? 

Today, I’m honored to have my personal friend and fellow blogger, Niki, tackle the tough topic of what it looks like to BE a strong-willed woman without compromising Biblical roles:





“What if Mama is the Strong-Willed Daughter?”

by Niki @ For Journey’s Sake



What if I am the decisive, unquestioned leader in my home?


What if I am quick with good advice and direction and am always right?


What if I am very confident in my ability to perform and get things done in a quick and concise way?



What if I am highly productive and let nothing or no one stand in my way of progress?


Does this make me a bad woman?


Have youever asked yourself these questions?


You are not alone and I hope to shed some light on your God-given personality.  If you have ever felt that God gave you the wrong personality because a strong-willed woman is not thought of highly in your circles, then I would like to tell you to worry no more.



God gave you that personality.



Dr. Taylor Hartman calls you a “Red” in his book The People Code.  Let me explain.   There are many personality types, but they can all be narrowed down to four basic motives that drive these personalities.  Dr. Hartman uses colors to identify them easier.  For a quick rundown it goes something like this.


Reds are motivated by power; they have ability to move quickly and efficiently from A to B.


Blues are motivated by intimacy; they feel life is all about relationships

and how to deeply connect with those around us.


Whites are motivated by peace; they are satisfied individuals

that give us clarity and show us patience.


Yellows are motivated by fun; they are enthusiastic and carefree individuals

that remind us to enjoy life!


You can read more about The Color Code and in-depth descriptions of the

Reds, Blues, Whites, and Yellows that make up our society by clicking on the links above.


Your core driving motive is what fuels every decision you make and it is God-given.


There are many Scriptures that prove He was thinking of us and planning what we would be long before we knew how we would “turn out”.


Here is the best part:  When God made us in His image, He formed us with an actual piece of Himself.  In light of The Color Code, God is the best of each color and He gave part of that to each one of us.



That being said (oh, there is so much more I would like to share about this, but I must stop!), when He made the Strong-Willed (Red) Woman, He gave her the power to get things done without hindrance or compromise.  He made her to be assertive and determined.  He gave her tenacity that the rest of us do not have.  He made her a leader that is focused and motivated.


How could that fit in with the rest of His Biblical commands to have a meek and quiet spirit and to be in submission to her husband? 




We’ll explore THAT topic tomorrow in Part Two! 


Tell me: are YOU the Strong-Willed Daughter? 



post signature


[author] [author_image timthumb=’on’][/author_image] [author_info]Niki enjoys homeschooling her five children, homemaking, sewing, and creating inspirational art for the home. She has been married for twenty years to her best friend, Steve. They have two precious blessings resting in the arms of Jesus. Their family has enjoyed working together in children’s ministry since 1992 and Niki is currently working towards getting her first children’s book published. She is the blog author of For Journey’s Sake and can also be found on face book writing about her passion to mentor and encourage women on their life’s journey.[/author_info] [/author]

Would you like to comment via your FB profile?

Author: Niki French

Leave a Reply


Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

5 thoughts on “What If Mama is the Strong-Willed Daughter? {part 1}

  1. I have always considered my being strong willed a survival mechanism. I was orphaned at a very young age and did not grow up seeing men in leadership roles. Thus my take charge attitude was developed before I became a wife and mother. At times my husband can be a good leader, but he does not have the drive, and easily becomes overwhelmed with adversity or hardship. I an the other hand will not dwell on the problem, thus leading comes easy to me. I am trying to calm my strong willed, but it has been my take charge attitude that had brought this family thus far.

    Posted on February 22, 2013 at 11:13 pm
  2. I am the strong willed mom raising a strong willed daughter (and a son that is also strong willed). I have wondered the same things. My husband’s leadership does not take the same form as that of a strong willed man. It is hard in our circles to appreciate this personality as well as my husband’s. He delegates a lot to me so that I am able to function under his leadership. He does not command but I am learning to read his heart and follow his lead without command. I also manage those things he has given me under his authority. Not always an easy task and it is often misunderstood among other believers. Looking forward to your insights into this area.

    Posted on February 19, 2013 at 4:50 pm
  3. Strong-willed ginger-haired mama, wife and daughter here. Firstborn, with a brother 9 years younger, and always overachieving in my youth, which led to exceptionally high (probably unhealthy) standards for myself…and everyone in my life. 🙁 My firstborn 3.5 yo daughter, also a ginger (!), is not terribly bossy or strong-willed…yet. But there are shades of it there and when push comes to shove, she is assertive and stubborn. I find myself often recoiling form her or grimacing when I see these traits, mostly because I see myself. Then I become sad, because I love her so much, but I don’t like those traits in myself, so I criticize them in her. It’s a bad cycle.

    Posted on February 19, 2013 at 3:46 pm
  4. Yes, I too am a strong willed daughter, wife, and mother raising a strong willed daughter. We often times butt heads and I get so aggravated when I see her acting like me because my biggest struggle is myself and I don’t want her to experience this as well.

    Posted on February 19, 2013 at 11:23 am
    1. I entirely relate, @90c5957e2a0cb69b98a067dd7ce143af:disqus ! I cringe when I see myself in my girl.

      Posted on February 19, 2013 at 2:08 pm