Read part one of Kathi’s post here if you missed it last week! 

I’ll be back at my usual blogging wheel soon, but today I’m happy to have Kathi sharing at the blog for me! 

-Kristy 

Advice to My Younger Self {from a pastors wife}

3. You can’t give out what you don’t take in.

Trying to give out to people what you don’t have yourself is like trying to pour water out of a dry bucket. It won’t work!

God so often stretches us and challenges us with what He requires of us, but He also equips us. Trying to ignore that equipment is like trying to run into a fire without the protective gear and training.

Many times, the Lord has used the passages of Scripture I have read and lessons He has taught me to help me meet the needs of others.

My most precious possession is my Bible and my stack of journals that contain all the scriptures, wisdom and lessons the Lord has taught me over the years.

Your most valuable tool in ministry is your time with God and getting to know Him and His Word.

4. I can’t solve people’s problems. But God can.

I remember when this truth really hit me that it was a defining moment for me as a pastor’s wife:

When I was confronted with difficult situations of women who came to me asking for help, I used to become anxious about what to say and how to counsel them.

Your most valuable tool in ministry is your time with God and getting to know Him and His Word. | Advice to my Younger Self {from a pastor's wife}

I felt very inadequate.

Once I realized that I could not solve their problems and it was only God who could, it took so much pressure off me. I no longer worry about saying and doing the “right” thing and having all the answers, because I don’t.

But I can show them the God who does.

I focus on teaching them how to know God and study His Word for themselves, and then God can and will meet the needs of their lives.

We are but “earthen vessels” which God uses (2 Cor. 4:7) He is the treasure – we are just the vessels.

Pray for God to work in their hearts and show Himself to them, rather than worrying about having all the right answers.

This final one was given to me by my dear pastor’s wife and mentor when my husband was in school studying for the ministry:

5. You can’t help people if you get into the pit with them.

Yes, I need to have compassion and I need to do what I can to help them with the hurts and problems they have.

But I need to make sure that I am guarding my own heart, and my emotional, spiritual and physical health.  

I cannot get so caught up in people’s problems that I get down and depressed myself, and neglect my own responsibilities.

Yes, I need to have compassion and I need to do what I can to help them with the hurts and problems they have.  But I need to make sure that I am guarding my own heart, and my emotional, spiritual and physical health, too." Advice to my Younger Self {from a pastor's wife}

So, dear one, if you are struggling as a younger pastor’s wife, take heart!

God will give you all that you need and you will succeed if you keep Him first!

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If you’re a young pastor’s wife hungry for fellowship, support and mentorship, I’d love for you to connect with Kathi, myself, and nearly 250 other minister’s wives… right here at our private Facebook group for pastor’s wives

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Author: Kathi Eshleman

Kathi is a seasoned pastor's wife, mother of 3 adult children, and grandma to 7 grandchildren. By the grace of God, all of her children are actively serving in ministry! Kathi's passion in ministry is to disciple women how to know God, and she loves leading Bible classes for both girls and women. If she has any spare time, Kathi enjoys reading and scrapbooking. You can follow Kathi's blog, Light in My Window, for more encouraging posts!

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